This past weekend, I was busy with the first of hopefully at least 67 annual life-altering road trips with old college friends. For those of you unfamiliar with this trip (all zero of you), the official title of the trip was the First Really Excellent and Annual Kick-ass International N’ Ultimate Road Trip (FREAKIN’ URT for short and URT for really short). I hope that those of you familiar with the trip will agree when I say that it was an incredible success. The highlights of the trip are as follows (in no particular order except maybe chronological):
1. Seeing and speaking to my friend Ms. Parker (who, incidentally, is the answer to the future trivia question: “Which one of Mr. Benchly’s friends did he mention first in his blog?”) for the first time in over 5 years;
2. Seeing my friend True for the first time in over 4 years;
3. The Travel Log, the official Weight Watchers Travel Log Pen of Justice, and the unofficial North Conway, NH Travel Log Pen of Justice that replaced the dead official Weight Watchers Travel Log Pen of Justice a few days into the trip;
4. Running over a baby seal at 75 mph;
5. Running into Baker at 3 mph;
5a. Baker running away at 5 mph;
6. Seeing my friend Mr. Billings and his significant other Cross and the wonderful world of Augusta, Maine;
7. Winning $4,500 from a scratch-off lottery ticket in Maine;
8. And discovering at the end of the trip that all participants were now speaking like Mr. Billings (a language we affectionately referred to as “Shaneish”). eg, “Mr. Benchly – talking like Mr. Billings. Ms. Parker – not amused.”
These are only a few of many factual and fictional highlights from the trip. More to follow later possibly.
Now, onto the most important part of the trip:
The URT allowed us the opportunity to venture to our old stomping grounds (aka, the University Whose Name Shall Never Be Said.) And after an all-too-brief walk around campus in which we discovered all students talking on cell phones; an all-you-can-eat buffet-style school cafeteria; motion-censor classroom lights; a Hudnall-less English Department; Freshman who could have very well been born after the Challenger explosion; and Seniors who were born after our first memories, the group decided in my head that we were all old. Very old. This concerns me.
That’s all for now. Goodnight.
In Stan the Sandwich Man’s name, I remain…
Mr. Benchly
Benchly'sword 